Good Riddance 2013

 

I don't know about you but I'm glad to see the back of 2013, it has been a terrible year for us.

 

I was forced into Medical Retirement from a job I loved 3 days before Christmas in 2012, which has resulted in me struggling to learn to survive on a tiny pension. Being unable to get a job and not qualifying for any benefits, this year has involved much tightening of my belt and learning to budget.

 

Himself has been most unwell and had to have two unsuccessful operations and is currently awaiting a third this month.

 

  

Christmas came and went, we had a power cut over the whole period and much of the surrounding area in Godalming was flooded, devastating many homes.

 

 

This picture was taken Christmas morning and is our local Bowling Green, more pictures can be found over on Badger Boo's Blog.

 

We're all electric here, so had no heat or oven to cook the Christmas Dinner, my brother kindly invited us over to his for lunch. We had a fantastic Christmas Dinner and it was most enjoyable to spend time with my family again.

Something I haven't done for many years, as Christmas is usually a very depressive time for me. Surprisingly with all that was going on this year with the weather and power cut I was feeling pretty upbeat for a change. 

 

So I say Good Riddance 2013 and welcome 2014 I have plans for you.

 

Happy New Year

 

xxx

 

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Now Panic and Freak Out

Only two and a half more shifts to go at work and next Wednesday I officially become a retired person Eekk!

 I'm only 47 years old, but they say I'm not fit enough to work there anymore so that will be that.

It has been quite an emotional week.

 Because of the way the shift system works I had to start saying my goodbyes this week, as I won't get to say my goodbyes to some of the wonderful people I have worked with over the last 13 years as they will be on rest days next week. 

Mind you there are some people I'm so glad I will never have to set eyes on or make polite conversation with ever again. Luckily they are only a small percentage of the workforce, most of the people there are brilliant and have been great to work with. Several I consider to be very good friends and I really hope we keep in contact after I leave.

So what will I do with myself?

I have absolutely no chuffin' idea!

Regular readers of this blog will know how much I have fought against this retirement decision, but to be honest I have got to the point now where I'm actually starting to look forward to it.

Love the title of this little book of quotations and thought it very apt lol

My job has kept me clean and sober for 13 of the 15 years since I cleaned up my act and stopped wasting my life. It's not always been easy, I deeply regret the years I wasted staring into the bottom of a Whiskey bottle and being estranged from my son, but I stuck with it and now we have a proper relationship again, and just because I will have time on my hands soon I intend to continue to remain clean and sober.

I love my job but as one door closes another one opens, well hopefully it will after Christmas as I will need to find myself a part time job to support myself **gulp**

A couple of weeks ago I knuckled back down to a healthy eating plan again, I really hate the word diet, I had worked so hard to lose over 7 even stone in 2010/11 and although I haven't put any weight back on, I am still a fatty with rubbish knees who needs to lose another 80 pounds. You can check out my weight loss story here, but I warn you the first picture is truly horrendous!

I've put a weight lose tracker on the left hand side of my blog under the Archive, because if I do it publicly I'm hoping it will keep me on track.  This is what it looks like (see little dog below) and as you can see I have lost 8lbs already, only another 72 to go.

I'm looking forward to spending a lot more time with my family, friends and of course my little dog Badger Boo plus spending time doing things that I enjoy, as for the last couple of years my life has just been work and sleep as I'm always so exhausted.

Through this blog I have had some wonderful support from people I have never even met, plus made some really good friends. I don't know what the future holds but rest assured I will be keeping you  all updated.

News at Last (sort of)

As many of you know the the last nine months have been pure torture for me, because my employer decided that I wasn't fit enough to do my job anymore. 

Yes I have severe Arthritis and yes it was a struggle to do my job, but I'm still able to do my job as a result of some reasonable adjustments that were put into place approx two years ago.

In those two years I have been happy in my work, and had very few sick days. In fact in nearly 13 years of working there, I have never hit the trigger point for disciplinary with my sick days.

I registered my Disabled status with my employer approx five years ago, as with all things computerised, systems get updated and Disability details needed to be re-entered, which I duly did as it's a legal requirement.

As a result of updating my details, I received a letter saying I needed to attend a medical, I have since attended several, all with the same result. 

I'm not fit to work!

I disagreed with these findings, due to the fact I was still at work and doing my job. So a meeting was called and I was interviewed by several people from various departments.

In June I completed all the paperwork for my Medical Retirement/Dismissal very reluctantly, and started my IT course to help me find another job.

As the months dragged on there was no news on the retirement/dismissal/job front and I'm still attending work full time. I would rather stay at work in a job I love, but I have come to accept it's for my own welfare these decisions have been made.

On the 30th October I received a letter stating I was being Medically Retired not Medically Dismissed, which is a massive relief, as I will be getting a small pension. If the findings had been for Medical Dismissal I would in a world of financial hardship, as you can imagine it was a huge relief!

I don't know when I will be actually retiring, there has been no mention. 

I'm still attending work!

It's got to the point that I've had enough! 

They got what they wanted, so just give me a leaving date and let me go! 

Daft as a Brush

Sometimes I'm so Stupid!

Last week I decided that I would start posting my Silent Sunday pictures back on this blog, to give you all a weekly break from my constant moaning.

So what do I do? 
I go and post it on Just Look and You Will See again!! So head over  there and check it out if you came here looking for it. I was confused, the linky came out early this week. If you follow me regularly, you will know this is actually not that surprising.

Being as I'm sat here writing this post I'll update you on the Job situation.

I got it. I got Medical Retirement and not Medical Dismissal. What a relief I can tell you.

So I'll be unemployed after 24th December, what will I do with myself? 

Maybe I will finally get to the bottom of that forever growing pile of ironing, who knows, but I doubt it.

I have no idea how I will survive financially. I have no real qualifications to get myself a decent job, although I did take my GCSE's in Maths and English three years ago, getting an A Star for both.

I may go back to collage, I have plans for a business, but can I do it on my own?

Or I might just sit down and watch every single episode of  "Lost"  again, now that sounds like a plan!

I'm not happy I am being retired off like some knackered old horse, but retirement gives me so many more choices than dismissal would have.

What will the future hold? 
I have absolutely no chuffin' idea, but it's really, really scary...

Stop the Ride, I Want to Get Off!

"Stop the Ride, I Want to Get Off!"

Have you ever heard those words as a roller-coaster sets off when someone changes their mind? 

That's exactly how my life has been feeling for the past few weeks, the pain in my back is becoming unbearable! I can barely do anything at the moment. I can feel the big black cloud of Depression pushing it's way back into my brain. 

 The house is a mess as I struggle to keep on top of things. We've been eating processed food **muck** as I can't stand long enough to cook, just walking around the in house is absolute agony. How I wish we had a downstairs toilet, I stand at the bottom of the stairs and they look like an impossible challenge, it can take me several minutes to climb them, so I'm now spending a lot of time upstairs to avoid the climb. 

All this extra back pain is on top of the Arthritis pain in my knees, hands and joints. My

Chuffin' Unbelievable!!!

Yesterday I had to go to the Admin Building to sort out some courses for my IT training and would you believe it, out of all the hundreds of courses available to staff, there are no IT ones, plus I had to miss my 30 minute meal break to do it!

Chuffin' unbelievable!!!

Me being me, I then decided to use my initiative (see, I'm not always as daft as people think I am) and phoned the on site education center, where I had done my Maths and English GCSE's  three years ago, and had also started and paid for the  ECDL (please don't ask what it stands for I don't know, but it's an IT course) to see if they still ran it.

As luck would have it I spoke to my old tutor, who spookly remembered me, even though he must have dealt with thousands of people since he last saw me.

A Cunning Plan *but still no answers*

It seems like an absolute age since I last had some news to update on the Job/Medical Retirement/Dismissal interviews.

On Wednesday had another long train Journey this time to Portsmouth. 

HMS Warrior

Who ate all the Pies?

The diet has been pushed aside over the last few months, far too much stress in my life over whether or not I was going to lose my job, than to be worrying about what I've been eating, and then getting a telling off by the nurse at the "Fat Clinic"

Although the job situation still hasn't been resolved, I'm more relaxed about the situation as I'm now being kept in the loop about what is happening.

My joints have been giving me some serious pain of late, so thought I had better check out my weight on the scales. 

A Strange Week

I have had the strangest week.

Monday:-  I made what has become the normal round of phone calls, trying to find out what the heck is going on with my job!

Tuesday:-  My back and neck were agony, so had to come home from work early and go to the Doctors, she thinks I may have a spur on my  neck trapping the nerves and making my hands feel all numb and tingly, so need an x-ray doing for that. In fact just remembered, I've still not phoned to make an appointment.

Wednesday:-  What a grotty day at work, with my back still playing up and I was trying to keep my temper as best I could, as a