Broken Promises

Where do I start? 

Every day I log on with the intention of writing a blog post and nothing gets written, so much for the promise I made to you all.
 **hangs head in shame**
Things are so good and things are so bad here at the moment.

Himself is in so much pain all the time, it's heartbreaking to see him suffering so, but at last he finally has a date for his operation, fingers crossed all goes well for him this time.

I'm due to see the Specialist next month,  I've been in so much pain with my Arthritis the last couple of weeks.
 I had the X-Rays of my knees done this week in preparation, they're looking really bad now, bone on bone in both knees and no sign of any cartilage that I could see, which explains the agony I'm in. 

Got discharged from the Physio-Terrorist yesterday, I'm really going to miss my weekly

Vets, Vets, Physio and Jumpers

Last week we thought Badger Boo had a stroke which was our Vets diagnosis, he was very ill and it resulted in a referral trip to Fitzpatricks, better known as the Bionic Vet. 

What an amazing place, luckily for us it is quite near to where we live, but people travel across the country to attend this amazing practice.

We were told by our vet he would need an MRI scan to determine whether or not he had had a stroke, luckily for my purse after the most in depth examination it was decided it wasn't a stroke as he was showing none of the usual signs.

We saw Dr Tim, and after checking Badgers reflexes and bending him in all sorts of directions **none of which he minded I might add** a quick look in his ear found the source of the problem. 

It was a GRASS SEED! It  had caused a middle ear infection affecting his balance. To say that was an expensive and embarrassing experience is an understatement, thankfully we didn't have to have the humiliation of the MRI too.

Chinks of Light and De-Cluttering

Last week I got signed off work with Depression, now my sick days have shot through the roof, which will no doubt mean a meeting without coffee with my new Line Manager. 

Yes, I have another one. This is the third since the the whole process of me being Medically Retired/Dismissed started up in February!

The first couple of days I felt pretty upset about the whole thing. Then on the Sunday I went to Redhill with Himself, for the presentation of his award for doing over 500 voluntary hours as a Community First Responder. 

The Black Cloak

It's here again, the enveloping black cloak of Depression and Paranoia, wrapping itself tightly around me.

 

I can feel it suffocating me as the O.C.D is taking over my life again. I'm exhausted with constant obsessive thoughts racing around my head. I'm struggling to be civil to people, I don't want to talk to them, and I certainly don't want them talking to me. I just want to stay at home where it's safe, I don't want to go out and face the world. I just want to be left alone.